Sun rising across a representation of the flat earth with the moon in the corner

Tennessee law makers to pass Flat Earth bill

Following the banning of chemtrails and the imminent banning of alien abductions, Republican law makers are accepting representations regarding other topics that make people uncomfortable. A lot of Tennessee residents feel that globe earth theories confuse their children and adds nothing to education.

With chemtrails banned and alien abductions about to be banned the Tennessee Republican law makers are on a roll with passing laws to keep their loyal constituents happy. They have had representations from various groups about some of the fancy ‘high falutin’ stuff taught in schools.

The consensus seems to be that ‘crazy shit’ ideas such as the earth being a globe, the solar system, evolution and other stuff was of no use to a down-to-earth hardworking Tennessean. “It just confuses young minds, along with a lot of grown ups” one Senator commented. With appalling rates of illiteracy (21.7%) it’s proving hard enough to get them to read the bible.

Law makers are planning a bill to stop teaching children about the earth being a globe and just stick to the flat earth ‘theory’. They want children to focus on the basics so they can start working in restaurants, lawn mower factories and abattoirs as soon as possible as they are cheaper than adults.

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