Some have not been at work since 2020. They are confused and bewildered. Some had to use a SatNav to find their building. Others were horrified to discover Onesies were no longer in fashion.
People who last saw the inside of an office nearly five years ago are now returning to their desks and are struggling to adjust. Some who started their jobs after 2020 have never been in the building. They don’t even know where it is.
Anna Philacksis (1.64m) said goodbye to her desk in March 2020. Within a few weeks she was set up to work from home. After a few months she had settled into a routine. Downstairs for 9 to switch on her computer and log into the VPN and respond to a couple of emails. She then had an hour of yoga to get in the mood to do some work. Most days she could manage 30 minutes work before she needed a break. Anna is concerned about returning to the office, “My cat is used to having me around all day for cuddles and to be let in and out at regular intervals”.
She has asked for what she thought were reasonable adjustments: having somewhere to do yoga in the morning and to bring her cat to the office. Both were declined.
Andy Wiffanammer (Virgo), started working at Page and Plant in 2021. He had only visited the office once to collect a laptop. He just parked in a side street for a few minutes to fetch it. He has no recollection of where the office is. Given the lack of affordable parking Andy is trying to work out how to get there by public transport. He did try a practice trip and needed to use the map on his phone to find it.
He is also uncertain what to wear. For the past four years he has worn onesies most days. On contacting someone working in the office he was informed that people don’t wear onesies at work, and that they went out of fashion ages ago.
Claire Voiant (brunette) returned to working in the office a month ago. She is certain that the desk she returned to was a lot smaller and shabbier than before. The bastards had also moved it. Claire used to have a nice view out of the window, but now her desk is in a dark corner. The plants that she had on the windowsill were all dead and left on her desk. She is angry that nobody watered her plants, and on close inspection she knows that her lovely chair has been replaced with a shitty brown one that doesn’t adjust.
Others have been unable to remember where things like the printer are.