Tories – Page 2 – The Daily Twerk

David Cameron, Emmanuel Macron, Olaf Scholz and Joe Biden on Omaha beach for D Day commemorations

Spot the odd one out

One of the people in this lineup of world leaders is the odd one out. The 80th commemoration of the start of the D Day invasion has been in the diaries of the leaders of various countries for a while, but Sunak had better things to do.

By Eli Twonk

June 8, 2024August 15, 2025

Baldrick from the TV programme Blackadder. A scruffy and dirty peasant character

Politics

Conservatives unveil new advisor to help with a cunning plan

Realising that they have had a few mis-steps with the election campaign so far, the new advisor is set to steer the Conservatives to election victory. The new advisor is reputed to be as cunning as a fox who’s just been appointed Professor of Cunning at Oxford University.

By Eli Twonk

May 29, 2024August 15, 2025

AI image of Rishi Sunak with a dead cat on a desk

Politics

Sunak throwing in the dead cat like a pro

The Tories lost credibility on economics, law and order, education, immigration, taxation and health. They need to come up with something. National Service! Guaranteed to seal electoral oblivion. The second longest suicide note in history.

By Eli Twonk

May 27, 2024August 15, 2025

Rishi Sunak — This image is licensed under the United Kingdom Open Government Licence v3.0.

Politics

Secure a better future for our country – Sunak calls election

With so many Tories defecting to Labour his choices were to defect himself or call an election. He has opted to try an election. Sunak is confident that come the 4th July there will be someone continuing the blue policies.

By Eli Twonk

May 23, 2024August 15, 2025

Sunak taking questions from staff at a warehouse including Tory councillor Ross Hills

Politics

Sunak takes a question from a plant

During a visit to a Derbyshire warehouse Sunak was keen to take questions from the staff. To ensure that he knew the answer it was helpful to have a Tory councillor dressed up as a worker asking a question.

By Eli Twonk

May 23, 2024August 15, 2025

J.K. Rowling holding a glass of wine — This image is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license.

Politics

When Boris Johnson supports you then your opinion is void

Boris Johnson has declared that JK Rowling is a “modern saint” for her Xcretions about trans women. Having an open homophobe and islamphobe supporting her is not quite the endorcement he thinks it is.

He falls back on the old ‘what people secretly think’ evidence base.

~ET

By Eli Twonk

April 12, 2024August 15, 2025

William Wragg MP — This image is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported license.

Politics

Is it right that the only way to reach your MP is on Grindr?

Members of Parliament can be very elusive. Reluctant to respond to emails, letters and telephone calls, some have taken to Grindr to reach their MP. We ask if this is right.
~ET

By Eli Twonk

April 5, 2024August 15, 2025

Politics

Brexit bonus; new charges on food imports won’t affect the poor as it doesn’t apply to chips

The additional charges on food imports that started on 30th April will bring in additional revenue on imports of food such as fish, salami, sausage, cheese and yoghurt.
This has been targeted at the middle classes as poor people only eat chips and turnips.
~ET

By Eli Twonk

April 4, 2024August 15, 2025

Penny Mordaunt looking ridiculous in some sort of blue outfit and shoulder cape with gold detail holding a sword at the coronation

Politics

Mordaunt; it’s my turn now

Having already achieved the record for the number of Prime Ministers in one parliament, the Tories are now taking it in turns to be PM.

Lee Anderson is annoyed that he shot himself in the foot and missed out on the chance to be PM.

By Eli Twonk

March 24, 2024August 15, 2025

Politics

Diane Abbott lucky to have lots of white MPs speaking for her

When the issue of the racist comments by a Tory donor came up in Prime Minister’s questions Abbott was saved the effort of having to respond. While the comments were aimed at her, lots of white MPs had their opinions aired on her behalf.

By Eli Twonk

March 15, 2024August 15, 2025