Rishi Sunak in a field with a unicorn
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Sunak definitely doing all those things that he never got round to before

Rishi Sunak has pleaded that all the things that the Tories promised to do before they will definitely, definitely do this time. Pinkie promise. As a bonus, all the things that they really should have done but didn’t, they get done too.

Sensing that people are beginning to notice that all the issues that the Tories are promising to fix are ones they have previously committed to addressing, Sunak is deploying the Pinkie Promise. As an added bonus he is also promising to fix all the things that got broken under the Tories.

Those forty brand new hospitals will get built, although probably quite a few more will need rebuilding by then. The repeated promises to sort out the social care sector so it functions better in respect to hospitals will be honoured.

He has promised to personally help build the 300,000 new houses a year that has been promised for a while. In a comment, “I have visited lots of factories where working people spend their days so I’m sure some manual labour skills have rubbed off on me. Plastering looks easy and fun.”.

The suggestion for creating a downward trend in NHS waiting lists is to let them grow massively, then bringing them back down to show a decrease in one quarter.

Every family is also promised a unicorn. That’s right. Free unicorns. What a guy.

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author

Karsic Karl

From Bristol I have a particular interest in gaming, pizza and energy drinks. Keeping up to date with technology and the dystopian invasion of the internet of things and subscriotion based basic services.

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