Nobody has ever given a sh!t about St George’s Day previously, so will you lead the fight back to hang on to that Greek bloke for England?
Do you get irritated by smart Alec’s coming out with stuff like St George was probably a Greek bloke in the Roman army? Who cares about that sort of stuff right? Other countries are claiming our geezer as their patron Saint because we are not celebrating him hard enough. It’s time to up our game otherwise Bosnia and Herzegovina, Bulgaria, Georgia, Ukraine, Malta or Ethiopia will nab him from us.
Have you got enough flags on your house?
If your house isn’t at least 50% covered in flags then you just aren’t trying hard enough. Get more flags and offer to buy flags for your neighbours houses as well. They will appreciate your kind gesture.
Get your family and friends to dress up as Crusaders
Everyone likes dressing up and St George’s Day is the perfect time for everybody to show their true English fervour. Ignore all those la-di-da know it alls blathering on about how a Greek bloke who died in 303 AD would hardly have worn an outfit from the 12th century. He absolutely would have if he had been given the choice.
Have a loud garden party on the day until 2am
Nothing can compare to a loud garden party for involving the local community in celebrating St George harder. Some might be reluctant to join in the celebrations on a Wednesday evening, but just crank up the volume, throw some more sausages on the BBQ and get some lagers down them. They’ll soon get into the spirit of the occasion and be dancing round the garden with a traffic cone on their head.